- Alcohol
How long have you been in recovery and what brought you to recovery?
I’ve been in recovery for eight years, after I was referred to a treatment program in Montana, when I was 17. I had been drinking and using since I was 13. It started with just hanging out with some guys. I was involved in the drumline at school and was part of an independent drumline in which most of the people were college students. I went to a drumline party and decided to drink. I knew it was a bad idea, as my dad was an alcoholic, but I did it anyway.
At what point did you decide something needed to change?
I went to treatment willingly, but I just wanted to get everyone off my back. However after I went, something changed, and I couldn’t imagine going back to the way I was living before. Life since has had its ups and downs, but I can’t believe where my life is now, and I think that’s why I stay clean—because of this life I have been given. I have tons of friends. I love traveling, and I have friends all over the country and lots friends in recovery. I have a job that I absolutely love, as I now work for the treatment program that I went to.
What words of advice would you give to someone who has yet to find recovery, or struggles to maintain theirs?
If you are not in recovery, and you want it, look for 12-step programs and any sort of help. If you are in recovery, and you are struggling, you really have to get in the middle of it. When I first got sober a good friend of mine told me that I need to be in the middle of the bed. It’s a lot harder to fall off, if you are in the middle rather than on the edge.
Are there goals you’ve accomplished or dreams you’ve pursued that you are particularly proud of because of recovery?
I am most proud of the fact that I can be a son. I can be there for my family. I can hold a job. I basically created the position I have, as there wasn’t someone in that role. I do marketing outreach for the program I went to, so I knew I was passionate about it, and I wanted to be able to help out in that capacity. I just reached out to my treatment center and said, “This is what I want to do.” However I think what I’m the most proud of is not external but the fact that I can be there for people and that I’m not a disaster in people’s lives anymore.
Before I got sober, I went out drinking on New Year’s Eve. My mom is a single parent and an artist, and she was staying home painting and trying to support the family. She told me not to go, but I left and in no time at all I was in the ER as a result of drinking. I went into a coma, and I was pronounced dead. I didn’t see it at the time, but my mom had lost her friends, because of my addiction, and she was afraid for me every time the phone rang or an ambulance went by. A few years ago I called her on New Year’s Eve, something I now do every year, to wish her a Happy New Year. Her phone was off, so I left her a message and didn’t think anything of it. She called me back the next day, and I could tell she had been crying. It didn’t hit me until later on, but the fact that she could turn her phone off showed she wasn’t worried about me. It’s taken awhile to get to this point, but my mom trusts me and my family trusts me. I can show up, and I can be there for them. They don’t have to worry any more, and we can be a happy family.