- Drugs
Angel was always the responsible one in the family. Him and his partners always had good jobs, took care of themselves and he was often referred to as the “rich uncle”. But he had a serious crack addiction and nobody knew about it, not even his partner. All through the years of his active addiction, he always had partners that were not at all using drugs of any kind. In Angel’s thinking, he did it for the reason that he was certain if he would ever hook up with another addict, then he would be totally lost in the addiction and fall down very fast. He thought that if he was forced to hide his addiction then he won’t use as much and as often. It worked out for him for quite a while this way.
Making the drug less accessible for himself and stopping when his partner came home did not make his relationships go bad as fast as openly using, but he still describes his relationships as horrible. There was trust, but always lies.
Some day during a work event he had a moment of clarity. He was working at an organization that was helping other people at this time. And he thought that he was surrounded by all these people helping others, but nobody saw what was wrong with him. He made a decision that day that living life that way had to stop. Next day he called his boss and got immediately fired. He called his sister and his mother, and went to their house and confessed.
He was tired of living this life of two different people in one person. He always made sure not to get caught, not to leave burn marks or anything anywhere. This double life lasted him six long years. He knew he needed help and went for the first time to treatment.
Just the way he went was something: He entered the treatment center with a Louis Vuitton bag over his shoulder and claimed a single room. He just told the people about some kind of bad sex addiction and that he would maybe harm others in the same room… just to manipulate the center to give him his private room.
A week later Angel decided that he had enough of this and left. At the back door as he was leaving, the counselor told him, “We will see you again and next time you will not be wearing a Louis Vuitton bag.” He was right!
Today Angel is 44, although he started using at age 18. He stopped using at age 26, as his second treatment was successful. He went to crack the express way– he never used any alcohol or pot or anything else on the road. Today Angel is working on his master’s degree and also helps a lot of addicts to find recovery.