Recovery – Hitting the Bull’s Eye
It’s a beautiful, sunny, and warm Sunday in Kentucky. Most people love to spend time outdoors, and so do I. I’m surrounded by lush greenery, good friends, and have a cold ice tea beside me. But I uncommonly enjoy a sport which, even as it gains more popularity among women lately, is still considered “a guy’s thing”: I love to shoot guns. Only in the past decade I have started to gain more and more interest in it, and with my growing interest did grow the size of the caliber. Now what does it has to do with recovery from addiction, you might ask? A lot! And here is why:
In this sport and in recovery I have a specific goal, a target. Raise, aim, and shoot are all steps of the process in shooting, but it wouldn’t make much fun if they would not lead to hitting my target, preferably right in the bull’s eye. I don’t want to just make noise, I want to see results. That’s my nature. For most people recovery consists of many steps as well, i.e. recognition of the problem, taking steps, admission, residential treatment, intensive outpatient treatment, sober living, halfway house, oxford house, fellowship meetings, therapists, and often some in between. All these steps would not be fun if they don’t lead to hitting the target: sobriety. And here as well: I don’t want to make just noise, the results are what I strive for. If the target is sobriety, I consider a total balance with emotional stability in long-term recovery, with all the happiness that occurs out of it, the bull’s eye.
To hit my target in shooting I need to be familiar with my tools, my goal, and myself. I can’t expect to be perfect in the beginning. I have to learn how to hold the firearm, how to breathe, how to look. I need to learn how to utilize tools that were given to me, like a viewfinder, a telescope, etc…I have a teacher to show me tricks and tips, how to get better, and improve stability. And then I need to practice, practice and practice my “raise, aim, and shoot” steps. If I practice enough, my moves will get automated and I do certain things without even thinking about it. Now it’s the same in recovery again. There are teachers, coaches, tools, steps and the target. It also takes practice, practice, practice. With some clean time under your belt, sobriety will be automated to a point. I don’t have to tell myself the mantra “Do not go in here!” in front of a liquor store anymore. I drive by without noticing it after some time.
There are Sunday’s in Kentucky that aren’t full of sunshine and I don’t like to go to the range and practice. I think that I’ve “got it” anyway, right? Didn’t I hit the target excellent the last time? But if I skip just a few times I lose my trained security in handling and miss my target here and there. Someday I will not only miss the target, but the board completely. If I miss meetings, I lose some of my emotional balance in sobriety, I lose some of my serenity also, and I run the risk of missing my target as well.
In the very beginning I said that with my growing interest, my caliber grew. While I was personally growing in my time of recovery, I went from simple tools like “don’t drink,” and “sit in a meeting,” or “do not go in a liquor store,” to “use DBT skills in my life,” or “help other alcoholics and addicts.” I had to start both slow and simple, but I can keep it interesting by doing new things.
I love the concentration shooting needs. You have to be in the present, not thinking about visiting Aunt Nellie later on, or making a shopping list in your head. Focus on the target is necessary at all times. My sobriety also requires that I focus on it. It needs to be a priority. If I get sidetracked from this focus and give other thoughts or things a higher importance in my life, I might miss.
With this I wish you all hit the bull’s eye recovering from addiction, alcoholism, eating disorders or any mental health issue. And if you are struggling, ask yourself why you just make noise and don’t see the results. Get help if you need it, usually a good shooter had a good trainer and uses great tools. There are countless great tools available, personal preference and circumstances decide which suits you the best. If you are clean and sober, but missing the happiness to go with it, just think how you can improve your skills. Just like everywhere in life, some reach a goal easier than others. It’s a question of talent for this particular process, some just grab it easy and others struggle more. If you struggle, you can improve your skills by working for it. Maybe visiting a convention gives new insights, or going to a retreat, some outpatient classes, yoga, new hobbies, trying a new sport, a coach, or a therapist? Many roads lead to Rome and to the bull’s eye of recovery, maybe you just haven’t seen yours yet. Sometimes it just needs to reset the eyes and erase the mind.
If you are the parent or spouse of someone in recovery help your loved one to discover his tools and support his aim in the right direction. Addiction is a disease and someone struggling can’t often grab all the tools himself, he needs help from people to hand them over to him so he can start to practice. I received countless help from treatment center employees, therapists, counselors, sponsors, other fellowship members, family, friends, co-workers and even neighbors. Some helped days, some weeks, some years, some only a minute with what someone said. The most important help I received was from my husband for years and years, without his support I would not be where I am today. And sometimes recovery needs a village, but it’s worth it.
Let’s get stronger together and share our experience. Let us use my blog as a tool for someone to get closer to his bull’s eye today. Please tell the other readers here at ‘join the conversation’ today: What do you consider one very important tool to hit your target in recovery? (Please be a little more specific than simply saying “AA” or “Treatment.”)
We do recover!
Susanne Johnson