- Alcohol
I drank almost every day for about five years. The last year or so, I couldn’t figure out why I felt like hammered dog poo every morning. It finally dawned on me: “You dummy! You’re doing this to yourself!”
My hangovers were getting to the point that I wasn’t able to keep food down when I tried to eat first thing in the morning. I had started peeing all over my apartment while blacked out. I’ve woken up to wet spots in corners and wet bath mats that smelled of urine.
I didn’t really go looking for help. I tried the “moderation” method, but that just made me angry. I would think, “It’s almost midnight. Why am I not drunk yet?” I would pound shots to try and catch up. I decided to go all in and to either keep drinking like I had for five years or to not drink at all. The thing that kept me from picking up a drink was remembering the horrible hangovers, the vomiting and the urine in certain corners of my apartment.
I have learned that when you stop drinking, you definitely learn who your true friends are. It turns out most of them are just drinking buddies. They dropped off very quickly. I have also learned that our society does not know how to date while sober. “Just have a couple of drinks to calm the nerves!” It’s very similar to how our society prefers not to talk on the phone and would rather text. Showing your true self (or talking on the phone instead of texting) can be kind of scary. However you are living this life for one person: yourself! Don’t worry about what others will think of you if you don’t drink or if you dye your hair purple. Everyone has their own battles they are facing. At the end of the day, those people aren’t paying your bills, meeting your deadlines at work or even raising your kids! Do what’s best for you.
The last time I was drunk was September 2006. I am coming up on 10 years of sobriety. I wouldn’t trade one day of it. I remember every minute of every day. I don’t wake up at a stranger’s house or in a gutter. (I have never actually woken up in a gutter, but I have woken up with a sprained wrist on one occasion and a cracked rib on another.) I have since gotten an associate degree and a bachelor’s degree. I could never have done this if I were still drinking.
It really does help to share your story with others. It may seem small or insignificant to you, but someone could really benefit from it.