How I Found My Voice Through the Arts
October is National Arts and Humanities Month. Music and art play an integral part in the recovery process. When I was in an inpatient treatment facility, music and art were condiments to the daily schedule of individual and group therapy, meetings, and informational lectures about the disease of addiction. There were times that these activities seemed like a break from the grueling daily schedule. However, looking back, I can see the purpose of the activities and the benefits of being able to partake in the process.
Art therapy is a nonverbal, therapeutic practice of expressing moods, emotions, and thoughts. When I got to treatment, I was enclosed in my own personal world. Because of my addiction, I had isolated myself for years. Conversations with others were just a necessity to appease others to let them know that I was still alive and supposedly doing well. I didn’t trust anyone and didn’t care to know any of these people that were around me. I was afraid that those around me would see the real me and not accept me for who I was. On the second or third day of detox, I remember doing an art therapy activity. We painted recovery rocks with symbols and colors that best expressed each of us as individuals. For me, this art activity was a conversation starter. It made me open up and explain to the group who I was and what I was all about. After the activity, people got to know a little bit about each other and started connecting with each other on a personal basis. My recovery rock made it all the way back from California to Tennessee. To me it is a reminder of how far I have come since then.
Music therapy in recovery programs is defined as a clinical and evidence based use of music to accomplish individualized goals within a therapeutic environment. The use of music in therapy is known to help manage physical, emotional, and cognitive issues within the individual. When I went to treatment, individual iPods were forbidden until you had passed an individual treatment level. Therefore, any type of music was a luxury. One of those luxuries, was a drumming circle performed by a Native American therapist, Sparrow. The experience was unique in itself. Varying tempos and volumes expressed many emotions. From calm and soothing to frantic frustrations, the whole experience was beneficial and therapeutic. Plus the knowledge and immersion into the Native American culture was educational. Music therapy was also used in group therapy. My therapist often began a session with a piece of music selected by himself or another member of the group that expressed their mood of the day. This often led to a group discussion about feelings, coping skills, and an interactive dialogue inside the group.
I am thankful for my experiences in treatment that opened my eyes to art and music in ways that continue to help me cope every day with my addiction. I remember about 90 days into my sobriety, I was driving to outpatient treatment one morning and I heard something that I had not heard in a long time. I was singing in the car and I was happy. That may not seem like a lot to some people, but for an individual that had suffered from addiction and depression for years that was a tremendous accomplishment. I remember laughing until I was crying. Not because of sadness but because of the joy of the moment. I still use music daily to help me cope. When I finally got my iPod back in treatment, I came across an old song I had downloaded years ago that really expressed my life going into and coming out of treatment. I shared it with my therapy group on my last day of treatment. It is a cover song done by the Holly Cole Trio. It best describes my journey to this day in my recovery. “Gone are the dark skies that had me blind. It’s going to be a bright, bright, sun shiny day!”
Please feel free to share my blog and please leave a comment! If you would like to share your story there are two ways to do it:
- You can reach me on Facebook at Bo Brown (Nashville, TN)
- Hit the “Share Yours” button on the heroesinrecovery.com page and tell them Bo sent you!
When you share your story, you can inspire others to break the stigma associated with substance abuse and mental health issues.
Much Love,
Bo