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Power

Nadine Herring
| August 26, 2016

There is a power that comes from sharing your story…

A sense of release; an ability to touch, inspire, and encourage others; a way to break stigma…

When I first decided to become a family addiction advocate, I knew that in order to really let people know what it’s like to deal with a loved one with addiction I had to share my experience. Opening up in such a public way about something so painful and personal was scary; not only would I be sharing my story with complete strangers, but I didn’t know if I was ready to relive those memories again.

After some serious soul searching and prayer, I realized that it was my duty to speak out for families because our voices are so seldom heard, and selfishly I needed to work through some of my own issues and have always found that writing helps me to do this.

The first article I wrote, “The Blame Game”, was both terrifying and cathartic at the same time. I was able to express long-held emotions in a way that was very true to me and shine a light on the suffering that we as family members experience right along with our loved ones with addiction.

When I hit that ‘submit’ button and posted my story online, I had no idea the effect it would have, if any, on anyone other than myself, but I was determined to put my story out there. As I’ve written about in the past, addiction and mental illness are not talked about openly like this in communities of color, so there was some fear of backlash on my part but I am happy to say that I have not experienced any of that. What I’ve found is that whether people know me or not, everyone has been incredibly supportive and it has made me want to continue sharing my story and speak out even more!

The most powerful thing I’ve experienced though in sharing my story is that it allows people who have been suffering in silence to step forward and ask for help. There’s something about reading or hearing about someone who has gone through what you’re going through and making it to the other side that lets you know that it is possible, you’re not alone, and there is help for you if you want it.

Sharing my story has helped other families realize that we have a voice too; we need recovery just as much as our loved ones do; we are not to blame, and we have to stand strong in our truth and help break the stigma surrounding addiction four our loved ones and ourselves!

I decided to share my story because I don’t want any more families to suffer in silence like mine did. I want them to know that we have the power to change hearts and minds and let people know that our loved ones with addiction are not evil, immoral, or weak people. They are people who are suffering from a disease and they need to be shown the same compassion and empathy that anyone else would get. I want families to understand that we didn’t cause it, we can’t cure it, and we can’t control it so we have to stop blaming ourselves or allow others to blame us.

Sharing my story has given me the power and the ability to heal and it is something that more of us need to experience and pass on to others!

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