Submitted by Sue, Heroes in Recovery lead advocate
As I sit and prepare to share another Heroes story, I am contemplating all the different reasons we may see someone as a hero in the recovery process. We may be the one in recovery from an addiction, or we are a family member. But there are still others who have directly or indirectly impacted us and have moved the recovery process forward in a positive way.
The heroes I want to tell you about today are my neighbors. They have lived alongside my family in the same cul-de-sac for the last 14 years, and I am so grateful to have them in my life. They are my heroes, because they have given and continue to give support and love to my family in difficult times. They do it because they want to, not because they have to. That is what we do in our cul-de-sac.
When our family entered the chaotic world of addiction, I needed to talk about it. Although I could pick up the phone to talk to family members, I needed to share with someone who could not only listen but was physically present. I could do this with my neighbors, who have become family over the years. Sharing our concerns and fears with those who have had a similar life experience allowed us the freedom to speak honestly. Others who hadn’t experienced anything like addiction compassionately listened, allowing us not to feel judged.
While my son was in treatment, we had the comfort of our neighbors, and so did he. Many wrote him letters of encouragement, another sent him a cross and spiritual support, and everyone always felt free to ask us about him and when would he would be home. We always kept him up to date on the neighborhood. They kept him connected.
When he returned home, everyone gathered at our house to share in welcoming him back. And, as a family, we thanked them for all they had done. But their caring spirits didn’t stop there. When our son went back to work and needed transportation, a neighbor gave him a bike to use till he could buy a car. Another hired him to mow the grass. Others had long conversations of encouragement with him. Childhood friends of the cul-de-sac reached out to him. He was surrounded by people who loved and cared about him.
During relapses, legal issues and the negatives that follow addiction, they have been there for him and our family, giving their time to comfort us with conversation, dinner, and sometimes distraction from the moment. They always find away to laugh and lighten the load when needed.
Although our journey has now spanned six years, life over the last year has been one of mostly positive change and growth, and we are still receiving their love and support. Neighbors are hiring my son for numerous jobs. They are showing their trust in him. One of our neighbors who offered understanding to us is now in the midst of the same journey with their child, and I am grateful to have had this experience to be able to be there for them. We are thankful for all their questions and desire to understand the process of recovery from addiction.
The many families of our cul-de-sac have each brought their love and support in different but equally important ways. They have brought their own personal life experiences, joys and sorrows, enriching us and helping us grow through this process. I also believe they have grown as well. Their love and support was never eclipsed by the disease of addiction because they knew our son before the disease and never forgot who he really was. They have been able to see past the stigma, and for that reason, they are all heroes.