- Drugs
Hi there,
My name is Jackie. I am 29 years old and I am a recovering drug addict. My life started to spiral out of control when I turned 14. My parents were getting a divorce and I was headed down the wrong path. I began smoking pot with my friends first then enjoyed getting high by myself. During the first few years of high school, pot was my drug of choice. Finally, junior year rolled around and I started attending raves. I experimented with Ecstasy, “Special K,” cocaine, and meth—basically a lot of the club drugs. I am not sure how I graduated high school, but I did.
I went off to school in Boston for a year and continued to smoke mass amounts of pot. I ended up leaving after a year and coming back to Chicago. I eventually found a quack doctor who prescribed me a whole assortment of contradicting pills from Valium (to come down from cocaine) to Norco for the non-existent pain that I had! I eventually became hooked on Norco. My life began to spiral out of control. I got into three car accidents, one after the other. My sister’s partner took notice and spoke to her about my drug use. My dad finally stepped in and told me to pack my bags and that I was going some place to get better.
I ended up going to youth rehabilitation program in Minnesota. It was a 30-day program. I got there December 15, 2005. That is my sobriety birthday! I went through detox while in 30-day program. Fifteen days into treatment, I had a seizure. I was rushed to the hospital and was scared out of my mind. My friends at rehab told me that they thought I was looking for something on the ceiling. Then they said I dropped to the floor after looking up. I am pretty sure I freaked them out. After that moment, each day became a little less cloudy. What got me through the 30 days was the good support system I was surrounded by and being able to play ping pong with the tech, Cody.
My family and I spoke everyday. My partner sent me cards every single day. That meant the world to me. Julie, my partner, made me hopeful that I could get through this and to stay strong. I am not sure she knows it, but she is the most amazing person! She helped me get clean and sober. After my completion of the rehab program, I was told I needed more support. I decided to go to the extended care program in California. I got to live practically on the beach. My mode of transportation was a pink cruiser (we called them “sober cycles”). It was given to me the first day I got to rehab. I met some great people in recovery. We helped each other get through it. Some of my friends relapsed and others made it through.
During my stay there, I helped create an activities group. We started a softball team and also started attending different events in the California area. We went to baseball games and Disneyland. I spent three months of my life recovering there. I can definitely say it changed my life for the better. When I got home, I realized that I couldn’t hang out with the people that I was once best friends with. That was extremely challenging. These were the people I was closest with for years. Slowly but surely, I got my life together. I was headed in the right direction. I finally graduated from college; for years I jumped around from school to school, never finishing anything. I found new friends through a sports league called CMSA. There have been many tough times throughout the last seven years. I have been sad at times, lonely, and frustrated. Throughout all the tough times, I never relapsed. Relapse is not part of my story. It doesn’t have to be part of yours either.
Today, I have a new set of friends. I have a new outlook on life. I have been in a sober, healthy relationship with the love of my life, Julie, for the past seven years. I feel blessed and fortunate every day. I still struggle with loneliness and feelings of sadness from time to time. Most days I feel good. My escape is through sports. I am running my second marathon in October. I am buying my first place. I am not jumping from job to job. I have a great support system. My goal is to bring a chapter of Phoenix Multisport to Chicago. Phoenix Multisport fosters a supportive, physically active community for individuals who are recovering from alcohol and substance abuse and those who choose to live a sober life. Every city could use a chapter. I am running the Chicago Marathon this year for the organization. I hope to spread the word to as many people as possible. My hope is that I can achieve this goal of mine within the next few years. As I said before, I remain sober through being physically active. It is a healthy outlet. It is my passion. Just remember to be patient with yourself. Each day gets a little less cloudy. Keep your chin up, because this adventure gets better. You can do it. If I can do it, you can. A few words of wisdom: you are not alone; don’t isolate yourself. There are people who love you more than you will ever know. Please reach out for help. Thank you for reading this. I never gave up. You shouldn’t either.