- Alcohol
- Friends & Family
Submitted by: Susanne Johnson
Brian has not a drink for one year and is not mad about it. Some people consider this the definition of true sobriety. His life has changed in a good way during this year, which was not always easy but was worth it. As he shares his story, his entire family sits in the audience, glad how it worked out for all of them together.
“No human power could have relieved our alcoholism. Only God could and would if He were sought,” is one of Brian’s main mottos about his recovery. His fellowship, 12-step meetings, his sponsor and a treatment facility helped along the way. He learned how to meditate in treatment through mindful breathing. When he inhales, he inhales God, so God is inside him. When he exhales, he breaths out grace, so that grace is around him. He practices this every day.
Born and raised in Kentucky, he had his first real alcohol abuse experience in seventh grade. His dad was his best friend, his hunting buddy, fishing companion and role model. He was at a local bar with his dad as a young kid– he recalls sitting at the bar and tried to match him drink for drink, having Mountain Dew at this time. He also had an older brother enabling him all his life, getting him all he could not get. His high school grades dropped, but managed college and got a good job.
He was following in his father’s footsteps in many ways. He wanted a beautiful wife, a wonderful house with a fully stocked refrigerator and lots of fun in life. He got married and all went well until his father died one day. This event was traumatic for him. He never took the opportunity to grieve properly, because he only stayed drunk. Shortly after this, his first child was born. He had the big house, lots of acres of land to hunt– basically all he ever dreamed off, but still felt that void inside, which he couldn’t fill.
First, trouble came up at home with his wife. With the help of a church minister he resolved the problems and stayed sober for a couple years and had a second child. Brian relapsed after this two years, his alcoholism progressed and he was hiding the bottles everywhere. He was a different person at work and at home.
Finally he saw the devastation in his family after several incidences and he wanted to get sober again. The minister of his church brought him together with a person who is now his sponsor in the 12-step program. But he was not fully committed, he tried to get by with half measures, put a 50% effort in, and it did not take long until he was totally drunk again. He couldn’t go to work; he was constantly drunk. “I did not want to go to sleep, because I knew I would be sick when I woke up,” says Brian.
He kept passing out, his wife asked him to leave home. That night he went to the gun cabinet three times. “The God of my understanding stepped right in again. The doors to my daughter’s rooms were open and I did not want to wake them up getting a gun out.” He went to his family’s home. His family sent him to a treatment center near Nashville and he finally got a grip on his problem. After his return, he contacted his former sponsor again and entered the 12-step fellowship again. He worked the steps, found a deeper faith, and now attends regular meetings. Brian loves to read the Bible, the Big Book and several books with daily meditations. Brian adds,”The promises will come true for you, if you work the program.”
Brian and his family have hope today. He defines hope as “a strong and confident expectation to want something to happen and be true; an optimistic attitude based on a positive outcome. Hope is wanting something better for yourself and for your loved ones.”