- Alcohol
My journey of addiction started when I was 14 years old. I had my first drink, given to me by my older brother, and my first high with pot, given to me by an older friend. I didn’t get too involved with anything until I turned 18 years old and moved out on my own. I then became your average “garbage can.” That was the first time I lost everything, and it only took about four months! I eventually tried a geographical change and moved across the state with my dad, hoping I would stay away from drugs, but I didn’t. Within a few months, I was kicked out of my dad’s home and was living with a guy I’d just met. He promised me the world, promised he’d take care of me. We stayed together for two miserable years, and I have two amazing boys (young men now) from those years. I learned many things about myself but nothing about my addiction. I went through many ups and downs and seemed to “control” my problem because I never knew I had one.
I worked for years and seemed to manage, but then I did something to my shoulder, and the doctor prescribed pain pills. Yes I had drank and smoked pot over the years, but when I got those pain pills, they took control before I knew what had happened. I was hooked like never before! When the doctor wouldn’t give them to me anymore, I found alternative methods. Eventually my addiction took me to a place where I lost my car and my apartment and was seconds away from losing my children. I was arrested in September 2010. I stayed in jail for 45 days. There I realized how far I’d gone and how badly I had been hurting everyone who loved me. My dad and step-mom took temporary custody for a year.
When I was released from jail, I went to drug court. I moved into a home with an older woman in recovery and immersed myself in my support group. I discovered a life I’d never known could exist! I was happy, joyous and free! I worked hard for all the right reasons: for my life, for my kids’ lives. I learned early on that the key to staying sober is to do it for yourself. I was sober for almost one and a half years before I relapsed. I had gained so much. My kids were back with me, and I had a good job, fell in love, was a good member of society and respected myself, and others respected me. I took it for granted. I was moving to Alabama with my then-fiancé and all three of our kids. I started smoking and drinking again and kept doing so for a couple of years until my husband got two DUIs in 28 days. By then I was back on pain pills, and as much as I tried to control it, even though I knew I couldn’t, it was controlling me. He went to jail for a couple of days, and he was then put into a drug-court program. After a few months, he realized he was an addict and asked me to join him in recovery. I fought him on this! I didn’t want to get clean again, but then my higher power showed me that He was answering a prayer I’d sent Him years before for a sober life with my love.
September 30, 2014 is my new sober date. My husband and I are working our own programs, together. We each have our own sponsor and work the steps with them. We attend meetings at least three to four times a week. The things that can happen when you take drugs out of your life and allow a recovery program in are amazing. We attend support group meetings that suit our needs for staying sober. I am a grateful recovering addict! Although the bad times were terrible, they led me to where I am today. Today I am sober and present for my family. I just recently lost my sister-in-law and made it through sober. Anything is possible to get through sober! I know you can do it! Find a sponsor. Go to meetings. Help another addict. We keep what we have by giving it away. Thank you for reading my story!