- Drugs
- Faith
I’ve cried many times over situations I can’t control. I’ve been angry, upset, spiteful, and hopeless. I’ve watched, seen, experienced, and become addicted to addiction. I’ve helped, calmed, encouraged, and at times I’m sure I’ve enabled. I’ve become a detective and a spy; my gut instinct hasn’t let me down yet. I’ve lost faith more than once; I’ve searched for answers in strangers I’ve never met. I’ve accused, I’ve been wrong, and I’ve blamed myself along the way.
I’ve held someone close to me just to make sure their heart still beats. I’ve stayed awake for hours on end trying to fight a demon that isn’t mine. I’ve watched, listened, and counted the minutes. I’ve had amazing days where my smile is contagious; I’ve had days that can change in an instant as soon as the phone rings. I’ve grown anxious, suspicious, cold, and somewhat numb. And I will continue to believe because I know there’s someone out there who knows where I’m coming from.