- Friends & Family
Submitted by: Susan Beckett
Life Does Get Better, When You Move On…
Willa was married to an alcoholic for over 25 years. They married young and had three children together. Although he was never “labeled” an alcoholic, he drank every day and had problems controlling the amount he drank. Their marriage ended in divorce, with alcohol being a large contributing factor, along with other behaviors, which became out of control.
While they were married, Willa felt sorry for her husband, because he always seemed to be searching for something to make him happy. She knew he had a difficult childhood, and thought he was depressed, but he never seemed to want to make an effort to change anything, or try to make things better when he complained. When they divorced, it was rough and she never saw it coming. However, when all the drama was over, there was a sense of relief.
Willa never drank much alcohol herself, due to her upbringing and due to watching her ex-husband’s use. Additionally, she didn’t like the way it changed his personality, and made him even more depressed and irresponsible than he already was.
As far as Willa was aware, her ex-husband’s alcohol abuse continued after their divorce. He remarried and moved to another state. She was informed by her children that he stopped drinking, several years later, following a severe accident, which occurred as a result of drinking alcohol.
Fortunately, Willa met and married an extremely loving man, who brought her much happiness. After ten years of marriage he became ill and died suddenly, but not without leaving wonderful memories, and a kind hearted stepson as a welcome addition to the family.
Willa’s greatest struggle with her ex-husband, to this day, is the lack of a relationship he has with his children. She lives alone, and doesn’t mind the independence, as she feels capable of accomplishing most of her day to day activities by herself. If she needs assistance, she is fortunate to have the support of family and friends, and she knows she can rely on them.
If anyone were to ask for advice, she would tell them to try each day, to be happy with who you are, and with what you have. Learn from your past, but let go of it and move on, because we only have today. Most importantly, hold onto your family and don’t give up on them, be as supportive as you can and love each other.