The Recovery Life Cycle
Most people in recovery will agree that substance abuse is a progressive disease. It’s something that rarely develops overnight. It can be viewed as a process, like growing a tree. First, a seed is planted, and over time, it grows through stages until it finally becomes a fully grown tree. A tree doesn’t simply go from being a seed to a tree overnight.
Addiction is in many ways the same. It is rare that a person first tries a substance and immediately becomes addicted to it. A person usually nurtures the addiction and, over time, it grows into a full-blown addiction problem. A lot of the time it takes years for addiction to grow from infancy to the serious problem that matures. During these stages, where the substance abuse becomes a full-blown problem, a person usually puts his family through countless trials and disappointments. In most cases, this process last years.
When the light finally comes on for the addict, he usually works a program that helps him find relief for his addiction. This is a new and wonderful experience for the recovering addict. He thinks he is finally on the road to a happy life, free from problems he previously forced on himself and his family. A problem many people in recovery face is that while they view their problems in the rearview of life, it is hard for people who have been along for the ride of addiction and misfortune to put these issues in the past as easily. This can lead to frustration at home, at the workplace, and with friends. The recovering addict seems to think, “I’ve gotten past these things. Don’t they realize that? Why can’t they shut the door on the past and just enjoy the new me?” This may seem like a simple task to the person in recovery, but to the person who has been forced to endure the hardships caused by another person’s addiction, this isn’t as easy as the addict would like it to be.
If others are not as easily convinced about the recovering addict’s newfound hope, frustration can begin to grow. This is something that commonly happens, but the addict must remember the long enduring troubles his addiction has caused for others, not just for himself. “We must remember that ten or twenty years of drunkenness would make a skeptic out of anyone.” (Alcoholics Anonymous pg. 83) A common saying related to behavior is, “The best predictor of future behavior is past behavior.” Who could blame a person for being unsure of an addict’s newfound sobriety when his history is marred by a trail of destruction, not recovery?
“But the head of the house has spent years in pulling down the structures of business, romance, friendship, health—these things are now ruined or damaged. It will take time to clear away the wreck. Though old buildings will eventually be replaced by finer ones, the new ones will take years to complete.” (Alcoholic Anonymous pg. 123) Just as a tree doesn’t form from a seed overnight or addiction doesn’t form overnight, recovery for others affected by the actions of an addict shouldn’t be expected to form overnight either. People recovering from the actions of an addict should be allowed the same life cycle. Hopefully, these people will grow toward their own recovery with the recovering addict and they can all experience complete recovery together. What is your experience with this recovery life cycle?