Keep it Moving
Lately I’ve found myself in a rut. My to-do lists are never ending, work, school, relationships, working on myself, the list goes on and on. I feel out of control. After talking to my boss, Heidi, today I took a minute to think and breathe.
When I got home I pulled out a box filled with basically every important item I have since I got sober this time around. I found worksheets from rehab talking about what I hoped to do sober, talking about the type of person I aspired to be, medallions from anniversaries, hundreds of letters and cards from family and friends letting me know how much they love me, medals, acceptance letters…the list goes on. Reading some of the letters, there was a common thing that everyone mentioned. They said how God puts people in your life for a reason, everything happens for a reason and to love myself and know that I am loved by many. They said most importantly, never forget to pray and remain grateful.
I find myself, when I am very overwhelmed with all the great things sobriety has given me, becoming ungrateful. I focus on everything I don’t have and focus on everyone but myself. I state every single negative thought that goes through my mind. When I’m in this mind frame I am in trouble. My anxiety comes in full force and I look for an escape in any way that I can. I start to care about things I shouldn’t and not care about the things that I should. My head starts to hurt from over-analyzing everything.
In one of the worksheets from when I was under 30 days sober I wrote to stay focused on myself and true to myself. Stay in a routine and always know that my higher power is with me no matter what.That everything will work out as long as I stay sober. I don’t know how at less than 30 days I had a better handle on what I should be doing then I do now!
The longer we stay sober the better our lives get. It doesn’t mean everything goes smoothly or our way but we do learn how to deal with it. Heidi said on the phone that everything we go through is another opportunity in which we get to experience growth. How true that has been for me. My reason for bringing up looking through my stuff was not to brag but just as another reminder as to how far I have come. When we stay sober and we are grateful to be sober things get good. Every peak and every valley makes each of us a little bit stronger than we were before. Everything happens in time, so each day suit up, show up, put a smile on and let God do the rest.
When you find yourself overwhelmed how do you deal? What coping strategies do you use?