The Power of Resilience
One of my favorite sayings is a Japanese proverb that states, “Fall seven times, get up eight.” Have you ever felt like life is knocking you down? I know I have. When I lost my son to the demon of drugs, I was knocked down so hard that I didn’t want to go on. As in, “I wanted to die,” didn’t want to go on. I’ve had people say to me “I don’t think I could go on living if my son/daughter died.” I used to say the same thing. But the truth is– you really have no choice. Life goes on despite the fact that your reason for living is gone.
Here’s where I did have a choice: I could wander aimlessly, drowning in self-pity and lamenting the unfairness of it all or I could scrape the broken pieces of my life back together and try to make something meaningful out of my loss. Of course, I didn’t get to that point for a very long time, but eventually I did. And still, three years later, the grief and self-pity come back to visit with regularity. But I refuse to give up. What keeps me going? Pure stubbornness and the knowledge that I have the ability to help prevent this from happening to someone else keeps me going. I feel it is my responsibility to do everything in my power to get back up and make sure I am fighting this fight for those who still have a chance.
Along the same lines, I can only imagine the heroic effort it can take for people in recovery to maintain their recovery. You have probably asked “Why me? Why do I have to suffer from addiction?” I wish I had a simple answer for you, but I don’t. Sometimes life just isn’t fair. What I do know is that those who must endure great adversity develop a powerful skill—resilliance—the skill to get back up and carry on, even under circumstances that would cause most people to crumble. We are the strong ones! We have learned to keep moving forward despite unbearable hardship. Take pride in that fact. I do believe in a higher power and a “bigger picture” that we will someday understand. I believe we are given these trials to teach and help others. We struggle so that others may learn. You may have a different belief, but it’s the only thing that makes sense to me.
We are going to slip…I will continue to have bouts of depression and grief. You may relapse. If you do, please do not give up. Get back up. A slip doesn’t have to take you down for good. There is no shame in a slip. You have already proven that you have the backbone, the strength, and the grit to find recovery. Do you know what a huge accomplishment that is? So take a moment and feel bad or mad or pitiful or whatever. But dig deep, use that resilience, and get back up! Work your program, lean on others, and look at it as a learning experience and move on. Remember, fall down seven times, get up eight!
So, you who have demonstrated courage and strength, you survivors, you warriors…won’t you join me in helping others? Please share your story. You can do it in one of 2 ways:
1) Go to Heroes in Recovery – Share Your Story and enter your story here. Say Pam sent you.
2) Message me on facebook: Pam Adams Katchuck and we can talk in person or you can text me your story.
In love and light,
Pam