Autumn Means Time of Balance
For me autumn represents ‘Recovery’, not spring as some may think. No, I love to think about autumn. After a hot, hot summer (it isn’t really fun here in Kentucky) a cool breeze finally waves across my skin. It refreshes my body, my soul, my way of thinking. The beautiful color of the leaves wrap the world in a warm and comfortable light and the atmosphere is full and rich. There seems to be an overabundance of everything: too many leaves, so many trees and shrubs in the garden, full fields of corn or other harvests, huge pumpkins in the garden and gigantic hay bells alongside the roads. I aroma of apples is overpowering…and I love it!
The world needs to renew, it is time to harvest the fruit of work and fields, prune trees so they grow better and healthier, cut foliage of perennials in order for them to come back next year even bigger and nicer. The trees shed their leaves and make room for new ones. In recovery I had to get rid of a lot of things from my past to make room for new things, new experiences, new friends, a new life. It was a good-bye not for tears but for the good and for growth. I had to let go of the past. I keep my memories (good and bad) and use them as stepping stones for my future, just as some flowers keep their bulbs. It does not have to be seen, but all strength comes out of it. Trees lose their leaves and prepare to grow their roots in the winter. Winter may be a time of hibernation, but trees gain strength during this time.
Autumn is also called ‘fall’. I hope nobody falls, but if you do, please fall forward or upward, just don’t fall back or down. We can learn from a fall if our reaction to it is right. But it is so difficult. I hope I don’t have to be in that situation.
Fall gets sweeter than summer, more flavorful, richer. I smell pumpkin, cinnamon and spices. I see reddish and orange, mums and hay. Fall also becomes more quiet. I don’t hear the blaring radio from the car next to me. The A/C is quiet again in order to hear just the leaves in the trees making this beautiful sound just like waves. I like to hear the wind. It has a beautiful soothing sound.
I like to get more active again in the fall too. The brutal heat is gone, I can walk, run, and ride my bicycle without being short of a heart attack! I don’t like it when you can’t hydrate as fast as you are sweating. In the fall, I can ride a horse, go hiking again and enjoy the wind in the sails. When have you done something childish and crazy last time? Have you jumped leaf piles lately? Go for it! Laugh! Go zip-lining or kayaking. Dig in the garden, get dirty, feel the nature. I love it! I like to be active during the day and get tired at night for a good night sleep without any drugs involved.
With fall we observe an equinox. That is when day and night are approximately equal in length. This happens when the sun crosses the equator. It happens twice a year. Interestingly, during the autumn equinox, the sun enters the astrological sign of Libra, which is the sign of the scales and of balance. In many spiritual papers autumn refers to balance. I have also shared my thoughts in one of my recent blogs, Balance in Recovery. Balance is so important for me today and I can find it a lot during fall.
These things in nature are a God-given transformation and it happens every year. I have to move and do something in order to keep transformation in my life. All things must die before they can be born. Look at the moon for example. The moon descends and then comes another ascent. The addict in me had to die, so that my new self could be born. I did let go of my past and enjoy now a fantastic new life in sobriety.
If you think it might be time for a change for you, please don’t hesitate. Use this special season to give it a start. Start to let go of old behavior and stop putting poison into your body that doesn’t allow you to enjoy all this beauty of life. Get rid of old things and get ready for a new future. It is not that difficult and help is available. It is just a phone call away. Many people are ready to help you rake the leaves of your old life and plant new seeds. During winter you can regain your bodily strength, like the trees growing new roots, and next spring you will be able to see a major difference in your life. You just need to give it a chance. I am glad, that I did. It saved my life and gave me a gift: the gift of many more seasons.
If you are already in recovery like me, maybe you can join me in working on balance. I want to be OK today. I don’t need to be super fantastic one moment and the next moment depressed. I may check and see if there are yoga classes nearby and give it a try this fall. I want to make more time for meetings again. Meetings always give me great balance. I want to make a list of my values and goals in life and see, where my actual life matches and where I need to improve. And I need to work on my expectations. How about you?
What would you like to do this fall to improve your balance in recovery and join nature? Shed off old things and make room for new experiences. What would you put on your list? Please share it in a comment and lets get ideas from each other!