The experienced and educated me views relapse as part of a learning process that will help lead the addict to recovery. For that reason, I no longer think relapse should be considered a failure. Instead of “Relapse is part of recovery,” I prefer the saying “Progress, not perfection.”
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We can’t do anything about the past, it is over. The future does not exist. All we have is right now. Through recovery, making peace with the past is one of my most favorite parts about it. I had so many reservations from my past and it weighed me down.
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Make the re-entry into life for the addict smooth. If possible pick him up in person from the treatment center, take him home to some good food and let him talk if he wants to. He got discharge instructions from the treatment center and might have informed you already. There might be Intensive Outpatient Treatment to follow, or maybe just regular visits with a Therapist and 12-step meetings. Encourage the newly sober one to follow these instructions, but don’t scare him or distrust him right from the beginning.
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Three years ago I was 87 pounds struggling to get sober. At that point in my life I could have never pictured myself training for the Boston Marathon!! Well here I am, four days away!
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Your parents’ grief goes on and on. Your mom has flashbacks of finding you. They never get over your death. They loved you so much, how could they? They try as best they can to go on and make a good life, and sometimes they even feel happy. But your shining presence, now gone, leaves a hole that can never be filled. Your struggle is over, and they are happy for that. Theirs will continue as long as they live.
Continue Reading Now that my son has been clean for more than a year-and-a-half, I am experiencing a tremendous amount of joy watching him mature into the wonderful young man I always knew he could be. Chronologically, he’s now 24; emotionally, he’s getting very close to that same number. He has a job, a checking account, lives with his girlfriend (they adore each other), and is pretty much self-sufficient. He’s even talking about going back to school. If he does, I’m convinced that it will be for real this time.
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