I’m often asked how to proceed with sobriety and recovery once the first steps are over. We are clean, detoxed, got the idea, started living the life and all that. A lot of people get the idea that now it’s time to grow. But what does it mean?
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There are many ways a person can find healing in dealing with his underlying issues. Some of these involve seeing a psychiatrist, employing various types of therapy, working a 12-step program or finding alternate ways of dealing with the underlying issues.
Continue Reading When time arises to make a decision about getting sober or not, many people face the same obstacles that built a brick wall in front of me on my path to the future. I had the fear of the unknown, the unwillingness to crawl out of my comfort zone and face facts, the lack of hope and zero knowledge about the recovery process itself. But I had discovered one essential thing: the strong desire to live.
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While in my active disease, I had created a facade of who I thought I was. The symptoms of alcohol abuse perpetuated this illusion, and I found myself believing and living this lie. The lie compounded itself through interactions I had in the workplace, with friends and with family and loved ones. The more I built upon this lie of sand and rubble, the shakier my construct became. Until one day, it collapsed. This found me in desperate hopelessness and without a solution I could rely on.
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There is power in numbers and in having others to lean on. When I lived with the addiction of my son, Andy, I found myself embroiled in a world of craziness. He was suffering, and, believe me, I was suffering too. Addiction impacts the whole family, not just the addict. I have never felt as powerless in my whole life as I did watching my beloved child slowly slip away from me. I tried to handle it on my own by loving him into recovery. I mistakenly thought my love for him could cure him.
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Rebalancing means getting back to the things that nurture me physically, emotionally and spiritually, whether it means returning to lifelong joys or adding something yet untried. Change happens over and over but each time it is different. This time, the change feels bigger and more challenging for me. I willingly work it to shed those cobwebs that can grab hold and stick to me.
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